sex is...

sex is what happens between movies .

sex...what it is not...

for most...sex is an expression...of who they are not...then they see how far they can take it .

the sex book...

i read a book from the 1950's that described masturbation as a mental illness...do you know what i never read ??? a book apologizing for that book .

...fuck all you want...

...fuck all you want...just don't confuse it with love .

yeti sex is rough...

hhhhhsex !!!

sex...it has been worshipped...and crucified...very little in between .

jerk off...etc .

my favourite russian hockey players...jerk-off...jack-off...and wack-off .

a cup of java...

fuck around with your head so much...it becomes as confused as your sexuality...then have a nice cup of java .

hide your sex...

hide your sex...get your religion .

pizza hut...

you know you are in trouble...when you start taking your dill-do to PIZZA HUT for supper .

discovering your sexuality...

discovering your sexuality is like discovering most anything...but with more guilt .

bear trail sex...

why doesn't your clergyman ever tell you to avoid having sex on a bear trail ???

...god knows...

as evolution goes on...sperm will learn to jump out of toilet bowls...how far ??? god only knows .

a transcending love...

a transcending love...breaks you into a new universe .

let go...

if you can't let go of your pussy cat...you most certainly cant let go of your boyfriends pocket pussy...nor his mother .

...so bee cool...and let go !!!

olives and ass holes

what people do not understand is the relationship between ass holes and olives...that is to say , the consumption of an olive leads  to the inevitable use of an ass hole somewhere down the line .

...and this is what we refer to as math .

assholes and knees...

...don't you find it interesting that both religion and sex...want you on your knees ???

...peanut butter...

reality and sex...together...like peanut butter and jelly...and just about as sticky .

one cell or more...

do you find it strange that only intelligent animals masturbate...and everything...one cell or more...fucks ???

...bunny , honey...

next time you have sex...meditate upon the bunny within .

...wacking off...

wacking off...it is more than just an ''olympic event'' .

contrast...

loving someone enough that you would die for them...and they can still find excuses to piss all over you .

m . bating

...god is not pissed at you for masturbating...as long as you do it in the right direction .

...sex is...

sex is like a bucket of you .

transform...

love can be transformer into sex...and sex into love...thing is...everyone needs a hand .

sexual profiles...

my guess...two or three hundred very specific sexual profiles .

religious guilt...

harness that religious guilt...and turn it into an orgasm .

before sex...

before sex...take your balls bowling .

fear...not...

if you fear sex...then fearing all else is right around the corner .

...never thought of that , did ya ???

if you are a woman...and you marry someone of the same sex...do not be surprised if they have breasts .

sex...and more sex...

sex...if there is no guilt...it don't count .

...very strange...

people beat the shit out of love with sex...very strange .

more on masturbation...

most masturbate with a gun in one hand and their penis in the other .

olympic games...

masturbation should not be in the olympic games...it should BE the olympic games .

true...

true sexual intimacy...leaves you naked .

vibrator blues...

my suspicion is...the world would be in far better shape...if vibrators had been invented thousands of yours ago .

hole - li - ness...

...everything you find in religion you find in sex...like holiness .

the ballad of sam the sperm...

sam the sperm was a mighty fine sperm but he got flushed to sea .

are you having sex :

...to perpetuate a lie ??? to get back at someone ??? to be sneaky ??? to get drunk and screw ???

religion is not there...

religion is not there to hurt you...it just comes by it naturally .

everything offers something...

fear will make you see the world ass - backwards...which , of course , has its own merits...

the art of sex...

sex is an art...that is...you make a big fucking mess .

are you having sex ???

to piss someone off ??? to be sneaky ??? to control ??? fuck...you might even love them !!!

sucking something...

...everyone wants to suck something...and religion will turn you into a liar .